¿Por qué es tan complicada la pronunciación en inglés?
The Chaos (1922)
Dearest
creature in creation
Studying
English pronunciation,
I will
teach you in my verse
Sounds like
corpse, corps, horse and worse.
I will keep
you, Susy, busy,
Make your
head with heat grow dizzy;
Tear in
eye, your dress you'll tear;
Queer, fair
seer, hear my prayer.
Pray,
console your loving poet,
Make my
coat look new, dear, sew it!
Just
compare heart, hear and heard,
Dies and
diet, lord and word.
Sword and
sward, retain and Britain
(Mind the
latter how it's written).
Made has
not the sound of bade,
Say-said, pay-paid, laid but plaid.
Now I
surely will not plague you
With such
words as vague and ague,
But be
careful how you speak,
Say: gush,
bush, steak, streak, break, bleak ,
Previous,
precious, fuchsia, via
Recipe,
pipe, studding-sail, choir;
Woven,
oven, how and low,
Script,
receipt, shoe, poem, toe.
Say,
expecting fraud and trickery:
Daughter,
laughter and Terpsichore,
Branch,
ranch, measles, topsails, aisles,
Missiles,
similes, reviles.
Wholly,
holly, signal, signing,
Same,
examining, but mining,
Scholar,
vicar, and cigar,
Solar,
mica, war and far.
From
"desire": desirable-admirable from "admire",
Lumber,
plumber, bier, but brier,
Topsham,
brougham, renown, but known,
Knowledge,
done, lone, gone, none, tone,
One,
anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen,
laundry, laurel.
Gertrude,
German, wind and wind,
Beau, kind,
kindred, queue, mankind,
Tortoise,
turquoise, chamois-leather,
Reading,
Reading, heathen, heather.
This
phonetic labyrinth
Gives moss,
gross, brook, brooch, ninth, plinth.
Have you
ever yet endeavoured
To
pronounce revered and severed,
Demon,
lemon, ghoul, foul, soul,
Peter,
petrol and patrol?
Billet does
not end like ballet;
Bouquet,
wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and
flood are not like food,
Nor is
mould like should and would.
Banquet is
not nearly parquet,
Which
exactly rhymes with khaki.
Discount,
viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to
forward, to reward,
Ricocheted
and crocheting, croquet?
Right! Your
pronunciation's OK.
Rounded,
wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and
fiend, alive and live.
Is your r
correct in higher?
Keats
asserts it rhymes Thalia.
Hugh, but
hug, and hood, but hoot,
Buoyant,
minute, but minute.
Say
abscission with precision,
Now:
position and transition;
Would it
tally with my rhyme
If I
mentioned paradigm?
Twopence,
threepence, tease are easy,
But cease,
crease, grease and greasy?
Cornice,
nice, valise, revise,
Rabies, but
lullabies.
Of such
puzzling words as nauseous,
Rhyming
well with cautious, tortious,
You'll
envelop lists, I hope,
In a linen
envelope.
Would you
like some more? You'll have it!
Affidavit,
David, davit.
To abjure,
to perjure. Sheik
Does not
sound like Czech but ache.
Liberty,
library, heave and heaven,
Rachel,
loch, moustache, eleven.
We say
hallowed, but allowed,
People,
leopard, towed but vowed.
Mark the
difference, moreover,
Between
mover, plover, Dover.
Leeches, breeches,
wise, precise,
Chalice,
but police and lice,
Camel,
constable, unstable,
Principle,
disciple, label.
Petal,
penal, and canal,
Wait,
surmise, plait, promise, pal,
Suit,
suite, ruin. Circuit, conduit
Rhyme with
"shirk it" and "beyond it",
But it is
not hard to tell
Why it's
pall, mall, but Pall Mall.
Muscle,
muscular, gaol, iron,
Timber,
climber, bullion, lion,
Worm and
storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator,
spectator, mayor,
Ivy, privy,
famous; clamour
Has the a
of drachm and hammer.
Pussy,
hussy and possess,
Desert, but
desert, address.
Golf, wolf,
countenance, lieutenants
Hoist in
lieu of flags left pennants.
Courier,
courtier, tomb, bomb, comb,
Cow, but
Cowper, some and home.
"Solder,
soldier! Blood is thicker",
Quoth he,
"than liqueur or liquor",
Making, it
is sad but true,
In bravado,
much ado.
Stranger
does not rhyme with anger,
Neither
does devour with clangour.
Pilot,
pivot, gaunt, but aunt,
Font,
front, wont, want, grand and grant.
Arsenic,
specific, scenic,
Relic,
rhetoric, hygienic.
Gooseberry,
goose, and close, but close,
Paradise,
rise, rose, and dose.
Say
inveigh, neigh, but inveigle,
Make the
latter rhyme with eagle.
Mind!
Meandering but mean,
Valentine
and magazine.
And I bet
you, dear, a penny,
You say
mani-(fold) like many,
Which is
wrong. Say rapier, pier,
Tier (one
who ties), but tier.
Arch,
archangel; pray, does erring
Rhyme with
herring or with stirring?
Prison,
bison, treasure trove,
Treason,
hover, cover, cove,
Perseverance,
severance. Ribald
Rhymes (but
piebald doesn't) with nibbled.
Phaeton,
paean, gnat, ghat, gnaw,
Lien,
psychic, shone, bone, pshaw.
Don't be
down, my own, but rough it,
And
distinguish buffet, buffet;
Brood,
stood, roof, rook, school, wool, boon,
Worcester,
Boleyn, to impugn.
Say in
sounds correct and sterling
Hearse,
hear, hearken, year and yearling.
Evil,
devil, mezzotint,
Mind the z!
(A gentle hint.)
Now you
need not pay attention
To such
sounds as I don't mention,
Sounds like
pores, pause, pours and paws,
Rhyming
with the pronoun yours;
Nor are
proper names included,
Though I
often heard, as you did,
Funny rhymes
to unicorn,
Yes, you
know them, Vaughan and Strachan.
No, my
maiden, coy and comely,
I don't
want to speak of Cholmondeley.
No. Yet
Froude compared with proud
Is no
better than McLeod.
But mind
trivial and vial,
Tripod,
menial, denial,
Troll and
trolley, realm and ream,
Schedule,
mischief, schism, and scheme.
Argil,
gill, Argyll, gill. Surely
May be made
to rhyme with Raleigh,
But you're
not supposed to say
Piquet
rhymes with sobriquet.
Had this
invalid invalid
Worthless
documents? How pallid,
How uncouth
he, couchant, looked,
When for
Portsmouth I had booked!
Zeus,
Thebes, Thales, Aphrodite,
Paramour,
enamoured, flighty,
Episodes,
antipodes,
Acquiesce,
and obsequies.
Please
don't monkey with the geyser,
Don't peel
'taters with my razor,
Rather say
in accents pure:
Nature,
stature and mature.
Pious,
impious, limb, climb, glumly,
Worsted,
worsted, crumbly, dumbly,
Conquer,
conquest, vase, phase, fan,
Wan, sedan
and artisan.
The th will
surely trouble you
More than
r, ch or w.
Say then
these phonetic gems:
Thomas,
thyme, Theresa, Thames.
Thompson,
Chatham, Waltham, Streatham,
There are
more but I forget 'em-
Wait! I've
got it: Anthony,
Lighten
your anxiety.
The archaic
word albeit
Does not
rhyme with eight-you see it;
With and
forthwith, one has voice,
One has
not, you make your choice.
Shoes,
goes, does *. Now first say: finger;
Then say:
singer, ginger, linger.
Real, zeal,
mauve, gauze and gauge,
Marriage,
foliage, mirage, age,
Hero,
heron, query, very,
Parry,
tarry fury, bury,
Dost, lost,
post, and doth, cloth, loth,
Job, Job,
blossom, bosom, oath.
Faugh,
oppugnant, keen oppugners,
Bowing,
bowing, banjo-tuners
Holm you
know, but noes, canoes,
Puisne,
truism, use, to use?
Though the
difference seems little,
We say
actual, but victual,
Seat,
sweat, chaste, caste, Leigh, eight, height,
Put, nut,
granite, and unite.
Reefer does
not rhyme with deafer,
Feoffer
does, and zephyr, heifer.
Dull, bull,
Geoffrey, George, ate, late,
Hint, pint,
senate, but sedate.
Gaelic,
Arabic, pacific,
Science,
conscience, scientific;
Tour, but
our, dour, succour, four,
Gas, alas,
and Arkansas.
Say
manoeuvre, yacht and vomit,
Next omit,
which differs from it
Bona fide,
alibi
Gyrate,
dowry and awry.
Sea, idea,
guinea, area,
Psalm,
Maria, but malaria.
Youth,
south, southern, cleanse and clean,
Doctrine,
turpentine, marine.
Compare
alien with Italian,
Dandelion
with battalion,
Rally with
ally; yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay,
aye, whey, key, quay!
Say aver,
but ever, fever,
Neither,
leisure, skein, receiver.
Never
guess-it is not safe,
We say
calves, valves, half, but Ralf.
Starry,
granary, canary,
Crevice,
but device, and eyrie,
Face, but
preface, then grimace,
Phlegm,
phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Bass,
large, target, gin, give, verging,
Ought,
oust, joust, and scour, but scourging;
Ear, but
earn; and ere and tear
Do not
rhyme with here but heir.
Mind the o
of off and often
Which may
be pronounced as orphan,
With the
sound of saw and sauce;
Also soft,
lost, cloth and cross.
Pudding,
puddle, putting. Putting?
Yes: at
golf it rhymes with shutting.
Respite,
spite, consent, resent.
Liable, but
Parliament.
Seven is
right, but so is even,
Hyphen,
roughen, nephew, Stephen,
Monkey,
donkey, clerk and jerk,
Asp, grasp,
wasp, demesne, cork, work.
A of
valour, vapid vapour,
S of news
(compare newspaper),
G of
gibbet, gibbon, gist,
I of
antichrist and grist,
Differ like
diverse and divers,
Rivers,
strivers, shivers, fivers.
Once, but
nonce, toll, doll, but roll,
Polish,
Polish, poll and poll.
Pronunciation-think
of Psyche!-
Is a
paling, stout and spiky.
Won't it
make you lose your wits
Writing
groats and saying "grits"?
It's a dark
abyss or tunnel
Strewn with
stones like rowlock, gunwale,
Islington,
and Isle of Wight,
Housewife,
verdict and indict.
Don't you
think so, reader, rather,
Saying
lather, bather, father?
Finally,
which rhymes with enough,
Though,
through, bough, cough, hough, sough, tough??
Hiccough
has the sound of sup...
My advice
is: GIVE IT UP!
